When you are right but the consequences tell you are wrong

 I deactivated my social media accounts, except for youtube.

I am mad as hell realizing that the support I needed was never available.

I am upset to receive an advise to go back quickly to the perpetrator and reconcile asap.

I am upset because I know how the people will respond on what happened to me==which is I deserve it because of my fucking mouth. Same reaction when someone was also beaten few years ago. 

In as much as I want to take my life-- I can't be certain on the future of my kids. But if I stay here, I am not confident that I can provide them with good life only by myself.

When I thought I was doing the right things, I am being punished. 

The memory of a time that I stood up for my brother and told that my parents are the ones who allowed them to go out and now they are angry and both of them beat me up.

Same fucking story of how I stood up for something I know is right -- and I am beaten up.

So I think-- i failed in this life.

I feel so disappointed, hopeless and everything that I do is pointless.